Feminine Fire Pt. 1: What Being a Feminist Means to Me
DISCLAIMER: I am not a life coach, psychiatrist, or currently participating in any activist group.
Feminism - The theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes.
My dears, this post was a long time coming. I have given little hints and sneak peaks, but I thought in honor of the summer and birthday to come, I want to express what I find beautiful.
I found myself talking to my mom one night, confiding how I want to speak more about womanhood, current politics, and all those "taboo" subjects that aren't to be spoken about at work, public place, and sometimes even between friends. So, with who then? When is it okay? I know there are communities and organizations who focus on the real big stuff. But damn, I just wanna have some deep inspiring conversation, unafraid, and authentic, about presidencies, war, the environment, white privilege, and woman empowerment. Yes, ALL THAT.
Then, on the other hand, I find myself thinking, "WHO THE HELL AM I?" I talk about avocados and salads, the importance of mindfulness and kindness. The uncomfortable stuff, even words, I dare not speak or avoid, because well, I created a healthy-living wellness blog with a focus on food. But, if I must classify and justify myself, I'm just a woman who believes in her potential and the potential of this crazy beautiful world we live in. With that said, here we go.
I believe that being a feminist is nothing more than being a human being. Nobody is better than you and you are better than no one else. There are certain reminders and ways I keep myself humble, open, and female as fuck.
Lay Off the Judgement
Whether you practice modesty or religious dress, a doctor or stay at home mother, a woman who shaves her armpits or not, or a man who resonates with the female soul, there are so many difference between us all, you will never hear about many at all. It's okay to be curious and ask, even maybe just wonder. But, when I hear that someone is not good enough, smart enough, or pretty enough, it breaks my heart. There are so many different beliefs it has become too easy to pass judgement onto one another. What makes us unique and human, especially in a place I call home, has created so much DRAMA.
Because I choose to wear revealing clothing and no bra make me seem I have less self respect? Because I choose to refrain from sex in time when women sexual liberation is becoming well acknowledged and accepted, make me a prude? Does me not smiling make you uncomfortable? I heard women are prettier when they smile. Are you automatically intelligent and worthy of work because you went on to higher education? If I didn't, would you think I was ignorant? When did clothing, job choice, education, or looks define a person? Those things were meant to empower us, not put us down.
You never know what someone else has went through or done to get where they are. When it comes to woman I see this way to often, even within themselves. What we do is usually for ourselves, not attention or praise. And if it is, I say this with sincerity, it is time for you seek something greater than approval. So please, be mindful of automatic judgement and be open to see what really makes that individual beautifully being.
Stand for Everyone
It's not just women rights, it's every individual's birth right to feel free and unafraid in the skin they are in. Whether it is indigenous Latinos being seen as illegal (correct term - undocumented), Muslims suspected as terrorist, blacks perceived as violent, or women seen as too sensitive or inad (forever far from), we have segregated ourselves greatly. There are men of different races violating women in the same way and when being prosecuted, they have different sentences. Why? Because one "will not be able handle the devastating impact." Oh, and the woman? Well, she should have never put herself in such a position to be abused in the first place.
Stand up for our children who are open and ready to receive so much love and knowledge, but maybe can't because politics say lower budget schools are not priority when it comes to education. Stand up for the woman next to you being harassed for wearing too little AND for the one made uncomfortable for wearing too much, stand up for the colored men who are being seen as a threat. Use your voice. Not your phone. Your voice is the greatest tool you have to make up for the women and children who are silenced. Ignorance may seem like bliss, until it affects you.
Shit Happens. Don't Get Over it.
I recently received came across a quote by Gloria Steinem. "The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off."
Get mad, get upset, send prayers, and love. Understand that this is the Universe we live in. It's hard to see the good in so much bad and hurt that happens EVERY DAY, but it's possible. Talk about it. Read about it and don't let anyone ever tell you, you are one person. There was once only one vegan, only one farmer, one female politician, and one company donating their products to young women in need of feminine hygiene products so they may go to school.
Do you see where I'm going with this? Don't stop with "that's the way it is."
Always with love and a big fucking heart.
PS. We are all a work in progress. To say I haven't classified myself once or twice as a chonga, or thought any man I met may be worth my time, would be lie. Take note on your own thoughts and words. They mean a ton whether spoken to yourself or to others.