I Made A Cake

And it was delicious.

A few times this week I was called out on my shit. Where are the blog posts? Why don’t you just go out? What are your hobbies? Even though I can think of quite a few different answers, they all became just excuses. I wanted to give partnered reasons to why while giving how I made the most of it. The hard stuff.

What do you go back to when it gets a little hard? What are the ways you get back to being you?

Every month I have some sort of draft saved to post for when it’s ready and time. When the pretty pictures are up and when my jumbled words and run-on sentences have been proofread by someone other than myself. But here’s the thing: my overall wellbeing usually affects when and how I show up. Writing a blog post or posting on social media is the first thing to take a back seat during those difficult times. Feelings of being fake or the hypocrisy of my words take over. The beautiful and yummy pictures of food are true, but are usually never meant for myself. But when I write, that still is.

I’m not sure if that is the right or healthy thing to do. But for myself, I honor my feelings and beliefs in that way. I’m fortunate enough to take that time to do so, as I know not everyone is. It’s hard for a business/individual, especially on social media, to be so transparent. I don’t know who actually reads my blog, but I am sure my clients and the connections I’ve made might have had a peak. I’ve always been a rather private person, now more than ever because a big chunk of my life I had to literally sell and market. Very easy my ability to cook and share all the yummy stuff with a side of face, became my worth.

So in the meantime, I’ve been trying to get back to the things that made me feel good. To bake and be in the kitchen with no other reason than I wanted to. I wanted to use beautiful apricots, organic cilantro, and juicy tomatoes to make something delicious, for me. Something I believed in and can actually share with those I love. When your hobby becomes your career, it seems almost impossible to separate those two things.

So, I brought along the books, specifically starting with something I know I’ll enjoy (hello anxiety). I’ve been an avid reader from a very young age and have been able to keep that curiosity, fantasy, and education from a book alive through adulthood. Subway rides went fast with just words. Connection with fictional character and stories seemed real when I wanted to escape my mundane 9-5 job.

The goal for now is to work on my health in every way I can at the moment. Eating good or better for me foods. Taking time without guilt. Dominoes, 5-star restaurants, local panaderias with endless breads and sweets, and the simple meals that give me the nourishment my body craves. It all became exactly what I wanted.

While I rode the all you can eat train, I also got physical in a way I never thought I would again. Being in New York, I learned to love walking anywhere, anytime. So, I took that pleasure with me in my own neighborhood with some company. Longer walks with my menace of a dog became a routine I didn’t know I needed. He took me out of my comfort zone and out of the house, because there was a time it would take days.

While I hope these things continue until tomorrow and weeks to come, I know I’ll figure out how to see you too. To reconnect in a way other than some type of screen. Showing up with authenticity and honesty.

This post was inspired by corn nuts and my desire for a vacation.

Spring 2021

Hi!

I am continuing my post that I started in February. Well, I actually just deleted it and here is the new one. So, Happy Spring!

I’m not looking at this season like I’ve used to. Usually it’s a way to let go of winter blues and diet changes, while bringing in new ideas and challenges. Between eating more vegetables, yoga, therapy, and taking all my supplements, I’ve tried most of the basics. This time I want to go a step further. What if this time I just build on what I’ve always done and tried? Build on my business and already set plans, stick to a practice just for the commitment, and start eating real meals instead of popcorn and chocolate covered raisins for dinner.

I wouldn’t say I’ve fallen off, but I definitely let my ability to procrastinate and overthink get the best of me. While I could write a list on a “how to” this season, why don’t I just show you? The things that bring me a sense of calm, a smile, motivation, and simple beauty back into my little corner of NYC and My Whisk and Mat.

Grounding This Winter

If you’ve read my blog for a while or have had enough converstations about my belief in health, one thing that may have came up is Ayurveda. Ayurveda is translated as the science of life.

For about eight years, I’ve kept Ayurveda in the front and back of my mind when taking care of my health. It’s how I use my body constitution and whatever season it is to stay well. For example, I have a very flighty mind. Different ideas and emotions come up, that even loved ones always had a hard time keeping up with. I tend to get cold very easily partly because of my small frame. My mind and body is ruled by air and ether. Constantly moving and changing, I work hard every winter to stay afloat, which is why winter is my season to show up and ground.

From the food I eat, to my morning routines, I am constantly aware. Working with the cold and dry air among us to stay calm, warm, and nourished. How? I use simple practices and tools that work for me. As I said we may have different body types and constitutions, but seeing as I have the opportunity to work with the winter with more attention and awareness, maybe you can see what you might need when feeling a bit… off.

How to Ground Yourself this Winter

Routine

During the summer, most of us stay out, vacation, and revel in the long warm days. Rightfully so, we should take advantage of the seasons warmth and tolerable weather to enjoy! In the winter, my routine is more important than ever. Waking up early to make the most of the shorter days is most important to me. I make sure to keep to my morning and night routines. Lemon water to start my day, teas to end, three or four cups of coffee in between. I make sure to dry brush and get my daily oil massages to keep my skin hydrated and lymphatic system flowing. These can be expanded, but for now pick what you love and stick to it!

Listen

Listen to your body. Listen to the season. Listen. For myself, it’s my digestion. I try to remember that I need a decent diet of some vegetable and whole grains in the day. But sometimes, takeout and laziness takes over, and I find myself backed up more than I like. Rather than do a quick fix, I work on it for the long run. Taking supplements, fiber, and eating better. I get myself back on track in a lasting way. Quick relief for constipation, body pain, or irregular sleep (which are usual season ailments) don’t feel as good as the long run would.

Keep it seasonal

Foods grown in your area are your best friend. They have the most nutrition and are most delicious so your body comes to crave them. Hearty soups filled with carrots, squash, potatoes, and sturdy greens. Roasted and cooked dishes that give you warmth and comfort on the coldest of nights. When your body needs it most, mother earth delivers. In the winter these root vegetables allow you to feel stable as that’s how they grow themselves. Bigger gourds, larger leaves, sturdy grown closest to the ground, it’s what you need the most during these colder brutal months.

Move

I work from home teaching, write from my living room, create menus using my pillow as a desk. Although there are times when I bust my ass in the kitchen for a whole day, those days get to me. My body becomes stiff in a way that I start to fear leaving my apartment and the 10 flights back to my door. Yoga a few times a week, simple stretches, and walks do wonders for a body that may tend to stiffen up a little more during these colder months. If you can work up a sweat, I applaud you, I’m not there yet.

Enjoy. Now.

Now more than ever it can be tough to get that motivation. Cooking everyday is not for everyone, moving when all you do is work from home can be difficult, and beating the seasonal depression can seem impossible when social distancing, closures, and sickness is all around. I’m not big on thinking about the future. I’m a present kind of girl, but these circumstances are not forever. So as you save for that house, put money towards your retirement, build your business. That’s all still going to happen, so keep yourself grounded and focused for now and then.

Curry Kabocha Squash Soup

You know, I never actually cared for soup.

I remember enjoying some sancocho at my grandmas, clam chowder on Ash Wednesday, and my mom’s chicken soup when you were feeling under the weather. But to actually ask and crave soup? It was a rarity that came with a cold at hand. If I ever made soup for myself, it was to heal with simple bone broth and whatever vegetables I can get from my fridge.

I was on a mission this fall and winter to change that. Why? Because soup is simple and still yummy, and I’m jumping on the bandwagon. Since being home more often, I realized taking time to make a simple meal didn’t have to be a to-do. I’m a rice and beans kind of girl through and through. Throw in avocado and vegetables for me and a pork chop for him, we are happy everyday of the week. But I’m a chef, who still appreciates to try something new for both myself and to share. We expand our knowledge and palates in the field no matter the preference, just for the love of food.

So I started with traditional fall favorite. Squash. It can be cut and roasted for a side dish. Baked and pureed to become soups, dips, or pie. Yum. Caribbean Latinos love calabaza to add in our beans and stews, ask any abuela. Considering it’s a nutritional powerhouse, I would say it makes anything healthy. You can fight me on it, but I enjoy pumpkin pie and sancocho like it’s healing my body and soul.

Here we have my version of a simple soup. Using my new favorite, kabocha squash, and a few other ingredients, this soup comes together easily and smoothly. It’s perfect to be paired with homemade croutons or a grilled cheese sandwich. Or on it’s own. Exactly how I intended it to be enjoyed. Simple ways to nourish the body and give it a little something special. Curry Kabocha Squash Soup.

Curry Kabocha Squash Soup

Ingredients

1 medium kabocha squash, roasted*

1 small yellow onion, diced

3 cloves garlic, minced

2 tablespoon oil (olive oil, coconut oil)

1 tablespoon curry powder

4 cups vegetable broth

1/4 cup heavy cream (sub coconut milk for vegan option)

pinch of cayenne pepper

salt and pepper to taste.

Directions

In a dutch oven over medium heat, sauté onions and garlic in olive oil. Wait until onions become translucent or soften and add the curry powder. Let the curry powder release oils over the heat. Add your vegetable broth scraping the flavor from the bottom of the pan if needed. Add the squash and stir until combined. Turn off the heat.

Now, transfer the soup into a blender. To avoid spillage and letting the soup have the opportunity to cool off a bit, I used a ladle until the end. Blend on medium speed until everything seems to have come together nicely, small chunks of onion are okay.

Transfer soup back into dutch oven, turn on heat to low and add your heavy cream, cayenne pepper, salt, and pepper. Stir over the heat until soup becomes silky and thick. Add whatever herbs or toppings on hand. Enjoy!

*To roast the squash, preheat the oven to 375. Cut in have and drizzle the inside with oil, salt, and pepper. Place cut side on to the baking sheet and bake for about 45min to an hour. Top should be soft to touch.

Falling For Autumn

Every pun intended.

If you know me and talk to me throughout the year or four seasons, you would know I am a summer baby, through and through. I live for humidity, crop tops, and a constant temperature of 85 and over. It’s not so much about the beach life or vacations, although I do wish it was easier and less expensive to do all that. It’s always been about the simplicity for me. Less makeup and clothing, imperfect natural waves, accessible farmer markets, and a mini tropical paradise that lives within the city streets.

And, this year I say good bye once again, but I don’t hate it…

If there is one thing that this virus taught me, it was to appreciate the simple things in any situation. And I’ve come to realize there is still a simplicity in the Fall. I found myself excited to wear sweaters and accepting the use pants in my own home. I have gravitated towards neutral colors and turning on the oven more often to bake up some much needed comfort food and sweets.

Maybe, because I’ve been accustomed to being home, the outside doesn’t seem so bad. A year ago, I was hustling between three jobs. Traveling to the Bronx, Queens, Brooklyn, and back to Manhattan. Worn out and tired, I dreaded the cold. With five months off, my definition of home became more important than ever. I created it and I’m excited to share it with others this fall and hopefully winter.

Nourishing my body, I focused on what I needed to add in. Cooking more and more vegetables. Phasing out the sweet bell peppers and welcoming the grounding potato, carrot, and beet medleys to come. Baking cakes and hopefully soon to be pies that I have no choice but to share. I’m hoping to share them not just physically, but through the what I always knew, this blog.

Although, I had more than enough time to work on anything and everything I could have wanted, some things required a little more work. Nourishing my body, which I’m more accustomed to doing wasn’t enough. Of course, everything is connected. For the second time, I will recommit to going to therapy and launching my business. Recommitting is one of the hardest things I believe. You already are too familiar with the feeling and possibility of some kind of “failure”. This transition season, I am transitioning my thoughts and desires to guide me into the life I was meant to live.

This year, I don’t have the cleanse for you to try or the steps for you to follow. I only have the honesty of what it’s been like and the plan I intend to follow. How have your plans changed? Not just with work and a new norm, but a whole different vision or feeling you never saw coming. I encourage you to let it ride this season. Fall in love with these changes.

These pictures were taken in the New York Botanical Garden in the Bronx.

What I Didn't Lose

It’s a Wednesday night. There is that summer rain mixed with thunderstorms and lightening happening that I so enjoy. I’m having some coffee and waiting for my audition with a prospective therapist. I swear, it’s harder and more expensive than dating. But, I’m committed, or at least reminded that I need to be.

That is what this post is really about. Things I reminded myself regardless of money flowing or not, job security, or a pandemic lockdown. I know I haven’t been alone on any of this. The struggle to either keep a float or keep it going. Even though my life hasn’t been predictable or stable for a few years now, I thought I had it. The drive, experience, and somewhat vision I had (let’s be positive, and say have) has been challenged. Regardless, some things stuck. Most days, at least.

Wake up early. I think I was sleep deprived before this pandemic. I went through a period of sleeping in until late mornings, which if you knew me, I was always up before the sun. I missed it. My quiet mornings and multiple cups of coffee. Reading in peace with no interruptions. It was my me-time. Whether you are a parent, have multiple roommates, or have a very personable job, me-time is a privilege I try to take advantage of while I still can.

Yoga, stretches, and breath work. I consider that all in the same field. There is always some mindfulness, intentional movement, or meditation that comes from those three things. I did let go of the intense, sweat dripping, power flow, but it’s amazing how a more calm flow compliments a more relaxed lifestyle I have adopted over the last few months. A little everyday goes a long way for the soul and body.

A drive to keep it going. Even though at times I have no clue where that might be, or it changes once again, I never want to just settle. With a culinary degree and a year of many different experiences (the only start I needed), I have been determined to stay true to what I believe in. Whether I am in a kitchen seven hours straight, teaching or feeding children, creating content, or just out of work… my feelings and observations are my own to understand. Sometimes it’s lonely. I sacrifice friends, vacations, and a instagram worthy lifestyle. But, what I continue to do and remember seems to be worth so much more.

Discipline, dedication, and drive.

Sunday Cortado 20

These posts are so therapeutic for me to get out there. I love reading articles early in the morning. To wake up, leave my phone for a few hours, and have my own time. I do my routine and sit myself in front of the laptop for an hour or so and read. I usually find myself wanting to share what catches my eye or attention.

Thankfully, I have a partner who usually asks me if I read anything good. But, why not talk about it here too… through my blog. For those that come around and visit, here’s what I’m reading, cooking, and feeling as of late.

~

This is a Podcast! Puerto Ricans are asked what is their race and the question is not so easy to understand.

I’ve been reading, The Turkish Lover. Esmeralda lets me see my grandma, mother, and myself in each book she wrote.

When they were just beginning. If you love some vintage photos and NYT article features, this is for you.

Do you want to know what Stanley Tucci is cooking during this quarantine? Yes, you do.

Grocery bills are rising. Something that hurts my soul every week while I still try to navigate possible options.

I’ve been getting some amazing reviews on these biscuits. Please make them. Easiest recipe ever.

And the cake from my last post, this Tres Leches. My new go-to.

This pandemic taught me how important it is to have a go-to brownie. These cocoa brownies are a must.

I finally started baking bread like the rest of the world! I stink, but these pitas give me hope.

Esquites. This is more for my partner than for me, but I’ll take them all summer long.

Two Months

Mom’s birthday cake.

When I don’t want to say much, but share it all.

Doing the best I can, just like you. Face masks and baked goods, missing restaurants and subway commutes, adjusting with loved ones on FaceTime, keeping my purpose alive, and learning a new way of life. The new normal.

Wishing you all nothing but strength, courage, health, and compassion. Until next time, which is hopefully sooner than you and I both think. I’m still excited (but still a little scared) to see what comes next.

Riverside Park, Washington Heights, Hamilton Heights NYC

After 2 week of self isolation….

First semi successful batch of homemade bread. Pita and hummus.

Padres off to prom in style.

Finally took a drive and to Stone Barns. Wasn’t how I envisioned my first time, but I don’t think I would have had it any other way.

Favorite homemade biscuits

New Jersey = Backyard

Social Distancing BBQ

Rooftop views, Uptown.

“Don’t worry, you’re just as sane as I am.”

Yummy imperfections

NYC bagel.

Spanish Harlem, NYC.

Nostalgia with a twist.

West Harlem Piers

From my favorite place, home for now.

Sunday Cortado 19

Rincón, Puerto Rico

I’m a news junkie. Email-morning-news junkie, to be exact. Every morning I read more and more current event subscriptions, ranging from the New York Times, to more story telling articles like, The Atlantic. I prefer to read than to watch the overdramatized channels on the TV, plus I don’t have basic cable. It keeps me busy during my hour and half morning commutes and somehow I always end up sharing an article with a “lucky” loved one.

I always thought it was important to share what’s been going on in the world, or just your backyard, and needs recognition. As somebody with a social platform (not very popular, but still), I feel the invitation to share or talk about things other than food is important. I can’t talk about it all, but I’m down to stay educated and hear the sometimes overwhelming amounts of views taken.

In pictures. For a whole year’s worth.

In pictures. For this past week.

Puerto Rico’s traumatic week is only a reminder of the struggles from the last two years or hundred… I love this island and breaks my heart to see what the U.S. has done to it and their people. Looking to help?

How other country’s people stay healthy longer. Tell me your secrets, or just your habits.

Flagship Harry Potter store coming to NYC!

5 habits to have after 5pm. I’m all about preparing for a successful day the night before.

I’m just adding to my already ambitious list of restaurants I would like to try.

This year will be the year I bake bread at home.

Cauliflower tacos is something I can do. Cauliflower pizza crust? Not so much.

One Year. One Month.

And one week since I moved into the city. So, am I a New Yorker, yet? Somehow, I made it to one year! I doubted myself many more times than I would like to admit, as any other person would with a meek bank account and a crazy idea they were meant to do something bigger, or just something else. This post is my reminder.

As people get into the New Year, I think we set a lot of goals and intentions, try to live through a mantra. I can’t help but think that really isn’t what I need this year. Are there things I would love to try and accomplish? Absolutely, yes. But, I think I need to get back to the basics first… again. What I need? A fucking kick in the ass to get back to the state of mind I once had. I can’t help but think I lost a part of myself that I was once so proud of.

I reflected over many of the changes and accomplishments over this past one year. I graduated culinary school, moved from New Jersey to Brooklyn to now Manhattan. I held 5 DIFFERENT JOBS, sometimes three at the same time. I felt more homesick than ever. I met an amazing person and love I never thought was possible. I took pay cuts and pay raises, went back to yoga, then stopped again. I’m lucky if I have some kale or spinach twice a month, something I had almost everyday.

Right now, my job is truly something I believe in. I’m not saying it’s perfect and my dream (still not sure what that is), but with perseverance I think I can make it worth my while. Hint: I’m a chef and get to interact with kids almost everyday. Never a dull moment, never a day without a smile. Yet, as any dreamer or hustler would say, there has to be more. If you are a dreamer or hustler with anxiety, sometimes that comes off as not doing enough.

For somebody who worked their ass to get to what where they thought they wanted to be, you can’t help but think of every time you are getting a little closer there is something always out of reach. For myself, I can’t help but think of those things are what I left behind. Everything from green smoothies, to good friends.

In the city with a dream, heart, and a plan that will most likely go not as planned, there comes sacrifices and uncomfortable changes. Times when money doesn’t let you do much, 1/2/3/4 roommates to live with, but if you are lucky become friends with, long subway rides that make you hope for the best, and let’s be real… mice.

The good? You are always bound to meet new people, and even if they aren’t forever, they can be pretty amazing for the ever changing days of your unpredictable life. Love and dating in the city can be mistakenly glamorous, and I wouldn’t change our story for anything else. You can see the most beautiful and heartbreaking places, all within a day, sometimes hour. Anyone can really do anything they want, and once I figure it out, I think I will. In the most crowded places, you still have the mental space that most towns and suburbs don’t get. When people walk fast, there is sense of great appreciation and camaraderie. Oh, and the food, something I want to start exploring more of.

So let’s bring it back. And let’s put it in writing. Even better, shared with the public…

My Goals. My Intentions. My Revisitation Rights.

1. Go back to yoga

2. Have some smoothies, preferably green

3. Work on my anxiety

4. Get some yummy food with friends

5. Make some yummy food for friends

6. Share my passion

7. Live with my anxiety

8. Write more

9. Make shmoney, save shmoney

10. Trust

This whole thing… Confidence. Confident I can make money doing what I love. Confidence to share my work, food, and passions. Confident that human connection will always make life worth while. Even for an introvert, through a computer screen…

Looks like I had some goals after all,

Sunday Cortado 18

Have to start somewhere…

Yesterday, Instagram gently reminded me that I started blogging in this space three years ago. Well, it feels like even more. Maybe, because I really have been blogging for longer or maybe because I’ve taken one of my longest hiatus yet. Why? Oh, you know the usual…

Figuring out my purpose, reconnecting with my why, feeling like I’ve already said all I can say. But, like any strong minded, passionate woman, that can never be true. I’ve went through more changes in the last five months than any other time I can remember, and I’m preparing myself for even more in the next couple of months. From where I’ll call home to what kind of career, I still don’t know. But, I got this. My space to write what my hands create and where my mind wonders.

My Whisk and Mat is still full of food, thoughts, and beliefs. Always open to the curious, the conversationalist, community.

~

I didn’t plan to get too serious this morning, but I woke to another alert on my phone. A debate often in my own mind what kind of world I have hope for.

Keeping cool with Ayurveda. Even a summer junkie like myself can get a little heated, just a little.

This reminds me of green version of shashuka. Yum.

A peanut free pad thai? Perfect idea for kids and those who don’t like nuts! (Those people do exist)

I made a chocolate zucchini bread not too long ago and got rave reviews even from the most apprehensive. Can I pull off a traditional one?

Smashed Cucumber Yogurt Salad. Nice twist to put on my weekly cucumber salad rotation.

I made my own recipe! Some modifications like extra butter, this blueberry crumble is still one of the easiest dessert out there.

This was an unplanned-I woke up like this-kind of post. Trying to take the “must” out of what I love to do!

Making Space This Spring

I’m writing this to you on the Spring Equinox, full moon, and three months till my 3-0 birthday. This is no big deal, just making it big because I want to. And I can, because this is the place I share things that help me relate in the deepest way to all of you. So a quick thank you, THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE NOW! And, we shall continue.

So, it is finally here. That little glimpse of hope for my people still hustling in this frigid (I’m dramatic, remember) cold weather. I don’t know about you, but I suffered in my usual fashion. With my move to New York, finishing up culinary school, and still not knowing what is to come next month (again, typical Yesi fashion), my urge to hibernate and not deal with it all has stronger than ever. But, I did. I pushed, then hibernated, drank a lot of wine, ate a lot of roasted vegetables, walked to places unknown, then hibernated some more. What happens when we ground, separate ourselves from the outside world even? We think, a a lot.

During the winter, I find myself secluded and internally focused more than ever. Makes sense. We have time to assess and prepare, to make ourselves feel comforted, whether from what we consume to our surroundings. We may eat a little more heavily (almost always seasonally acceptable), clutter our space to comfort or fit our every desire. If you are me, we hardly make it out. In general, it’s cold.

With daylight savings, it only served as a slight reminder. The time is coming to clear out. I don’t so much make a whole production like I used to. No kitchari, no juicing, no cleaning out closets or wiping down my whole place to smell like Method cleaner. We are doing what’s needed. When making space, I’ve learned it doesn’t have to be so grand, but what you see fit. Our needs, changes, and level of ability vary, so rather than go beyond my comfort to make space, I rather stay warm and open up to the not so comfortable that may take room.

Spring is three months, so I make three points. We are still in the beginning, so if you are looking to make changes, it’s okay to take your time…

1. Make space in your surroundings.

   I tend to have extra blankets, candles, and sweaters lying around all winter long. I like to tackle one room or space at a time. One big clean can jumpstart a season of maintenance. And, while my closet doesn’t really need to be cleaned out (I literally left more that half my stuff behind), I will start folding up sweaters and knits. Leaving space for the simplicity of the warmer weather is one of my favorite to-dos. Don’t underestimate the power of a good T-shirt and jeans combo!

2. When it comes to food, think GREEN.

   And I’m not talking juices or smoothies. Literally the market will have a theme of green leaves and more. We are still early for the bright reds and oranges of peppers, tomatoes, peaches, and strawberries (can you tell I”m a lover of summer), but we still have a good selection! Greens will naturally either help cleanse your system or give you the extra nutrition boost to go along with the blooming spring season. Like leaves growing away from the soil, I believe we slowly move forward from the grounding practices and earthy vegetables of winter.

3. Move.

   Confession. This is my “obstacle” and if there is anything that might bring me slightly out of my comfort zone, it’s to move. It’s crazy how we get so accustomed to what we do most, and if you work a desk 9-5 job, you know what I mean. Whether you’re a runner, spinner, or power yogi, I believe these exercise help not just release toxins, but thought as well. You will be doing the mind and body justice to relieve what has been cooped up all winter longer.

So do we fill this Space? Use it? Let it be?

I say it’s all up to you, my dears. I look at this as a time to release, reset, and recharge. I also use each of these points as guide lines. Some are more important, even complicated, to me than others. With my lifestyle, I want to use the joint effort of greens and sweat to boost my energy and immunity to allow something new in. Whether job, friends, or adventure, I’m looking to fulFILL again. As seasons and time go by, the more I see and appreciate the uniqueness in us all. So the saying goes, “Do you, boo!”

Do it with all your heart and health.

Root

Gandules Guisado con Bollitas de Platano and quinoa

Located at the base of the spine, the pelvic floor, and the first three vertebrae, the root chakra is responsible for your sense of safety and security on this earthly journey. The word Muladhara breaks down into two Sanskrit words: Mula meaning “root” and Adhara, which means “support” or “base.” 

The Chopra Center, The Root Chakra: Muladhara

Simply, the foundation.

To say I have been in survival mode for the past couple of months is dramatization of a strict routine ruled by weather and finances. Eat, sleep, and pay the rent. Every penny is counted (2.01 for a super small coffee), every minute is dedicated (can’t skimp on my 130 minutes of netflix a night), and I officially live by the bedtime feature on my phone (10:15pm reminder).

Writing this now, I even just realized that I cannot be alone on this. It’s the winter, none the less, we are cold and desperately trying not get sick. I mean, what if we actually had to take a SICK DAY? Nobody can afford those, anymore. Winter, you are something else. And New York too, goddamn, you’re tough.

During the last few weeks I’ve cried over a 9-5 survival job more than any grateful person should, counted just enough quarters to dry the last batch of laundry I could afford, learned how to set a mouse trap, and bring up the subways so effortlessly in everyday conversation with every other New Yorker. How quickly we get accustomed.

I’ve read books to go back. I go back to the days when Puerto Ricans fled to New York (Brooklyn to be exact) to have light, running water, and work. Go back when the Incas and Andeans who lost their land, but not their teachings. I also talk to my grandma. She tells me how easy it would be to make mofongo (after I buy a pilón, claro) and how she used to go to Prospect Park all the time, over 50 years ago….

That’s about the time, they were learning to survive to. From New Jersey, to New York, and back to New Jersey to raise a family and work their asses off. That’s where the foundation began. Merging Puerto Rico into an American way of life. My parents merging their Latin AND American values into our American Dream household. How I’ve been surviving? By trying to get to the root of where it all began.

I want the rice and beans to fill my protein deficient body, the bread to keep me full, the local squash and potatoes for that sweet nourishment I crave, sugar and coconut oil to for the cravings of my skin, classic salsa to keep my mind dancing when my body is too cold or tired to do so herself, and the New York spirit, because even when you have exhausted me, the reminder of fucking doing it, is still with there.

Rooting down with my culture and vegetables, surviving the winter months by keeping a roof over my head and my head out of the clouds, for once, I built my foundation. Lonely nights were filled with projects of dim lights and candles, perfect for cozy productivity in bed. Counting quarters taught me the value of accessible nourishing foods, not just for myself, but anyone who gets hungry. Subway rides gave me not space, but opportunity to go deeper, through the words of those before me.

This is how I root. Making my home in New York, with experiences I couldn’t have anywhere else, I dig my feet a little deeper, making sure I may extend my hunger, heart, arms, and mind ANYWHERE else, but with feet on the ground. In case you do need to go back to basics, the foundation will always be there.

Saturday Coquito

My holiday take on a Sunday Cortado…

Wishing you the all the amazement and wonder next year, each season, everyday.

Puerto Rican Coquito

Adapted from Daisy Cooks

• 15 oz can unsweetened coconut cream

• 14 oz can condensed milk

• 12 oz can evaporated milk

• 1/2 cup simple syrup or agave

• 4 egg yolks

• 2 tsp vanilla extract

• 1 tsp cinnamon

• 1/4 tsp cloves or nutmeg

• 2 cups rum

Siempre,

~yesenia

Back Home Buttermilk Pancakes

One week and a couple days down… forever to go. Is it sad that I didn’t even make it a full week until I had to visit home? It was different, nice, and as always, bittersweet.

I guess you can say I’m in that limbo. I went from a place I always called home and family, to a new city that needs exploring and roommates I’m still getting to know. I went from a kitchen I got so used to call my own, to one that has great value to a few others.  And, if you love to cook, you know what I mean.

I went back to Jersey for less than a day with a goal in mind, and maybe for that sense of familiarity and comfort as well. Yet, changes were made. I slept on the couch and didn’t even take time in the kitchen that was once my “space.” I rested and let my expectations go. Instead, I indulged myself with home cooked meals (not made by me) and I even made sure to bring some of that with me, a little bit of home. From black beans, sofrito, peruvian aji amarillo, and more clothes, I loaded up the car once more. We drove back to my little spot in Brooklyn I am still getting used to calling mine.

So, I came to accept. Accept my new home, this new reality. It wasn’t quite real before. In the back of my head, I thought I would be home in no time, so I made sure of it.  And for a split second, back in Jersey, I wasn’t even sure which place I can call my own. Then I remember writing back in Florida (kind of wish I still had those post to go back to), I’ll embrace this gypsy heart, where ever it wants to be.

To this day, I go to Florida not for vacation, but to go back to my second home. The one where I rest, fed bomb Puerto Rican food , do some yoga, and spend time with some pretty important people in life. l noticed I leave a piece of my heart where ever I go. Like any meaningful relationship it made an impact, and most likely will always stay with me, if I choose it to. Where I am now, I can’t say will be forever, but at least I know it will forever be home too. Have you ever walked the streets of New York City in the dead of night or the break of dawn? You’ll never forget it.

With that I leave you with some Buttermilk Pancakes. They are yummy, perfectly light and chewy. The best part? They can easily be made where ever you choose to call home, whomever you wish to them share with.

Buttermilk Pancakes

Serves 2-3

Ingredients

• 1 cup whole wheat pastry flour

• 1 tbs sugar

• 1/4 tsp baking soda

• 1/4 tsp sea salt

• 1 - 1 1/2 cup buttermilk

• 1 egg

• 1 tbs melted butter + butter for greasing pan

Combine dry ingredients in a bowl and set aside. Whisk together wet ingredients. Preheat pan over medium heat with some butter to prevent sticking. Combine the dry ingredients into the wet and using a spatula, slowly fold to combine. Mix together until fully combined, leaving any clumps. Batter should be thick, but still easy to pour.

Check to see if pan is ready by testing a dot of batter. Pan should sizzle and batter start to cook. Depending how big you want the pancakes, pour evenly onto frying pan. Once edges start to brown and bubbles form on top of pancakes, flip to cook other side for about one or two minutes. Take off pan, grease with butter, and repeat.

Top with butter, maple syrup, and whatever fruit your heart desires.

Enjoy!

Brooklyn Baby

A long time coming. Not necessarily the Brooklyn part, but my move away from home, out of Jersey.

For a while, I felt deeply out of place. If you asked me two years ago if I would consider even working in New York, my answer was “Hell. No.” I was a Jersey Girl. I had a car, I knew towns by their exits on the parkway, familiar with the east and west, laughed if you thought North and South Jersey were the same. I loved the dirty jersey beaches and was a frequent goer every summer with every car that I had. Until recently

Things were destined to change, with unexpected turns and losses, I slowly started to give it all up. I became a commuter. I was not sure if my sanity and money was worth it, but I continued. I continued to hustle, I sold my car, I started adding extra days and nights in the city, only to be home a few nights for dinner and on Sundays where I hated leaving the house. I felt displaced.

Boqueria, Forte Green, Brooklyn

I fell in love with New York and everything it had to offer. Going to school for something I was passionate about, the Union Square Market at my finger tips a few days a week, the buildings, the freedom, the ultimate place to be single and not feel yourself being left out. You are always welcomed somewhere. That’s what I drew me into this city. I never felt so happy or fortunate to just be me, to be on my own.

With uncertainty, little sleep, and not enough money, I took the opportunity. Instead of my will to merge my two worlds, the one of suburban NJ and the city streets, I decided to make New York my home, and pretty lucky to say Brooklyn now.

With every decision I have made, comes concerns and opinions of others. And, I guess that is why I kept this decision to myself. With only family and couple of friends to talk to about it with, even still I got every side mentioned to. And I moved the fuck along. Because, I not only learned a few years ago, but recently accepted, that my path is unique. It has not been done. Not the way I could do it.  I have taken much of what I learned in childhood and school, and pushed it away. I needed to create space to learn something new. 

So I leave you with this. A sincere thank you and promise. Thank you for continuing to read this blog and follow My Whisk and Mat whether in New Jersey, Florida, or New York. For the unbelievable support.  Believing in my mission and being part of the journey. And a promise, to not give up. Even when things got so emotionally and physically impossible, I found a way to make it happen again. Blogging, creating, and sharing is part of what I love, and I knew I had to find a way back to it.

I moved to Brooklyn. I moved to New York City.

MI familia, gracias.

Pictures by Michele Vignola.  Photography badass and amazing friend. 

What A Peach Pie Means To Me

Specifically this one. The one I made last Sunday, to celebrate the end of Summer, the end of the longest month of my life (exaggerating, but whatever), and also the beginning of a new practice. Does that all make sense? If not, that’s cool, because I have this whole post to get through.

Somehow, I found the energy to even write this post, still dark from the early morning with just my lemon water in hand. I tried writing this many times at my job, that I’m actually starting to outgrow, even at night in the midst of an Anthony Bourdain’s, Parts Unknown episode. Somehow, after a 16 hour day in the city and four hours of sleep, I chose this morning. Wide eyed, somewhat tired, and motivated. That, my dears, is not a normal habit for myself, if we’re being honest.

You see, there was always a reason. Whether it wasn’t the right time or I wasn’t sure I could do it successfully, I pushed one of the many things I told myself I would do aside. Am I talking about pie or a real life event? It can go both ways. My world feels like it has been turned upside down in the last month. In order to mentally cope and most literally slow down (not an easy task when walking the streets of New York and taking six trains a day), I put away MANY of my Summer Goals. One of them, making a peach pie.

This peach pie represented my biggest obstacle of the season, my biggest practice in life. I found the task intimidating, time consuming, and more intense than I’m used to. These are some of my obstacles when it comes to my biggest dreams. Maybe yours too. Could I make time to do this? Was it even necessary in a time when I “had to” focus on everything else presently going wrong? Why do I even want to do it?

Emotions were becoming mixed with reality and I couldn’t pull them apart.

I wanted to end this month with something beautiful. A reminder of why I strive to do what I love, everyday. Even writing this post, ending a very busy week, I knew this is what I needed to do, right now at this very moment, at least.

This post was unplanned and thought through on a whim, just like the doctor visits, health scares, and new bills that lined up for me to figure out. I made this pie on my last free day I would have in two weeks. Sacrificing a few extra dollas, time with friends, and doing what I “should”, I chose to make a pie. I chose to follow my dream. I chose to end a time, a season, a relationship, that taught me how imperfect and bumpy this thing called life is always going to be.

Yet, I’m not as intimidated. To just do it, is to make it possible.

I rolled out dough and made a beautiful crust. Not perfect, but beautiful. A filling made with the last of the season peaches, still sweet on their very own. With some practice and new adventures to come (a new job? homemade bread?!), who knows what exactly is next. Although, I do hope it’s delicious.

I used Joy The Baker, Peach Blueberry Pie. No blueberries or corn starch. I recommend corn starch and patience. Something my family did not have. Still delicious and devoured.

P.S. It’s September. Fall is about to begin. I. Smell. Apple. Pie

Sunday Cortado 17

I love summer rain.  I love the humidity or coolness (you just never know what you are going to get) that comes after.  I love both the thunder and stillness that happens as everyone tries to take cover.  Even the gloom, a calming effect to the usual upbeat excitement of the summer sun.  

During this dreary Sunday, I wanted to share what's been inspiring me.  Because, even on days like these, the love and hustle doesn't stop... in my eyes, it heightens.  Although, you may have the opportunity to take a little more time for yourself, dare I say, relax.  Go back into your book, reorganize your vision board, and maybe have that extra cortadito. 

~

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.  Learn that name.  Know that woman.  Changing the game in politics with humility, grace, morals, and strength, it's been amazing to watch.  In case if you are wondering if there are more, here are a few other progressive women to know. 

This one hit home for me in more ways than 1.  Young farmers and the food revolution of Puerto Rico.  This sparked MANY ideas.  

Top chefs working in our public schools is something I'm here for.  I was even excited to see one of my culinary instructors be mentioned. 

I need to see this ASAP! A tiny sustainable home in NYC, part of a UN and Yale project.  

Now that I'm diving into a chef world, I love to see what other chefs are loving and eating.  Healthy or not, it's pretty fascinating.  

This No-Bake Icebox Tres Leches seems like a fun (read easy) twist on my favorite cake.  

I finally read Bourdain's Don't Eat Before Reading This.  It all makes perfect sense!  And I'm proud to say I wasn't so far along. 

"I love the sheer weirdness of the kitchen life: the dreamers, the crackpots, the refugees, and the sociopaths with whom I continue to work;... Admittedly, it’s a life that grinds you down. Most of us who live and operate in the culinary underworld are in some fundamental way dysfunctional." 

 

Summer Blueberry Thyme Crumble

How has it been a whole month?  I swear, the summer just started.  I hope in some way you have been able to enjoy the warm weather and more laid back summer days.  Unfortunately, most of my time has been tied up, so I haven't seen much sun after I came back from vacation.  But, this comes with an amazing reason why...

I have started culinary school!  I am now a student at the Natural Gourmet Institute, and I couldn't be more happy, scared, stressed, and in love.  I did this more for myself.  As someone who started cooking at a very young age and food becoming a big part of my life, it seemed to fit perfect.  I was worried for a long time that passion wasn't enough.  If it was truly possible to take my hobby and turn it into my career.  It turns it out, it very well could be.

With longer days and nights, and very literally, no days off, thoughts if I could make this dream come true scared the shit out of me.  What if I do actually do it?  I believe we so often think how it may not happen, that dream or goal, leading us to not truly dive in and see how big and UNKNOWN it can be if it did.  Would you be ready for it?

I'm pretty sure I've said this before, but I don't believe in being ready.  Sometimes things are going to happen, situations and opportunities will arise, and you just have to act. For myself, applying to culinary school was an example of just that.  Did I have the money?  Hell no.  Did I have the time and energy to put another thing on my plate?  I knew if I wanted it enough, I could make it.  

It's been a world wind of emotions, and sometimes I can't verbally say what I feel, but maybe able to write it. 

In the beginning of the year, I wasn't sure what my next move should be.  I've accepted so many things that had or hadn't happened, until I realized I didn't have to anymore.  I wanted to prove to myself and others, I could do it my way.  I wanted to genuinely share my love and knowledge for food and health, with nothing holding me back.  I didn't need more money, the connections, a man, or mental stability.  Thinking maybe, for a little while, I could do it alone.  And although I really do have an amazing support system, that loneliness when working your ass off for something others may not understand, is always there.  And because of that, I learned to feel more confident in owning and hustling for my UNIQUE vision.  

So, here is my recipe of what I love and still holds true.

Crumbles are the dessert that make people fall in love with you.  Because you know what, they don't look that nice, but damn, they taste amazing.  Every concentrated flavor of the fruit comes out, the crumble is both indulgent and light, and if you serve with ice cream, you may win them over for life. 

Blueberry Thyme Crumble

• 2 pints blueberries
• 1 tbs fresh thyme, plus garnish
• 1 cup whole wheat pastry flour
• 1 cup rolled oats
• 2/3 cup sugar 
• 2 tsp cinnamon
• 1 tsp salt
• 1/2 cup butter (1 stick cubed, cold)

Preheat over to 350 and butter a 9x12 pan.

In a bowl combine flour, oats, sugar, cinnamon, and salt.  Add cubes of butter in the mixture and combine with your hands.  Make sure small clumps of butter remain, coated with flour mixture. 

Pour blueberries onto pan, and mix about 1/4 cup of the crumble plus thyme in.  Then evenly distribute the rest of the crumb topping. Place in the oven for 45 min or until topping is golden brown.  Top with more fresh thyme and ice cream.  Enjoy!

~No dream or goal will ever come to you easy, but you can easily take the first steps to making them come true~

Sunday Cortado 16

Augusta St, Elizabeth NJ

By the time I can get this too you all, I highly doubt it's "cortado" time, but it's Sunday, none the less.  As I write to you in a dimly lit kitchen, while the Florida sun is shining down, I can't help but give you a little bit of honesty.  I have been on a emotional rollercoaster.  Weekends to many, are a time to recharge, explore, and most likely to be spent with friends and family.  Mine as of late, and what I thought I accepted, is the hustle part 2. 

I wake up before 6am and put all my energy to get once step closer to my vision until sundown.  Cleansing, yoga, markets, kitchen, recipe, photography, and blog.  Yes, these are things I love, and I could never picture my life without, but I can't help but think what if I wanted what was "normal".  To go out with friends on a Saturday night, brunch or bbq on a Sunday, and spend time with a significant other, before another week begins.  

I found myself going into an anxious, doubtful, and exhausted hole.   Falling into an all too familiar space of loneliness, usually pretty dark and filled with fear.  What if I don't make it?  Will I sacrifice everything, for nothing? I've told myself it's part of the deal.  As a striving woman looking to make her WILDEST dreams come true, that space of loneliness is inevitable.  Right?

I was reminded last week it's not.  The depressed driven deaths of a few creative souls was a reminder to many.  Yes, we may all feel like this from time to time, it's just the extremities and how we deal that might separate us, but it doesn't have to.  As an introvert and one who rather read a story, then speak, reaching out can seem like the hardest thing to do.  But, here is my way of reaching out to you, with my honesty, hoping you feel the comfort of not feeling alone.  

I'm here for the connection.  For the shared journey.  

~

One that hit me pretty hard was Bourdain.  I do believe there is a strong connection when it comes to food and us, people.  

Families are being separated, all because they want to feel safe in our country.  That's. Not. Right.

Puerto Rico is the example of colonialism gone horribly wrong, and it's shamefully known.  So do you walk away or stay home.  Is your loyalty questioned?

Adobo.  Would you believe they questioned my Puerto Ricaness because I do not use adobo.  Rude. 

If you can make a good story out of enchiladas, I'm all for it.  

Food is therapy.  And, I plan to do a lot of it this summer.  Here's what to make in June. 

I leave you with this.  Reach out.  Speak out.